The pain of loss can feel very overwhelming and stressful, especially in difficult times like these where it feels like everyone is grieving in some form or another. It can be easy to push away and invalidate your own feelings when comparing them to what others are going through, but it is important to sit down with them and recognize why you are feeling this way. It is very important to process grief in a healthy way so you can protect your emotional and psychological health.
There are many ways to support yourself emotionally, socially, and spiritually and below are a few techniques to do so.
Acknowledging Grief
Recognizing that you are experiencing a loss of some sort during these challenging times is one of the first paths to recovery and support for yourself. Rather than comparing your loss to that of someone else, it is important to realize that you are feeling these emotions for a reason.
When you bottle up your emotions and make yourself feel invalid because of what someone else may be going through, your trauma and grief will continue to resurface. This will occur until you are able to sit with these feelings and acknowledge the grief you are experiencing.
Emotionally
During times of grief, it is quite common to feel very intense and mixed emotions and you may feel that you are on an emotional rollercoaster. These emotions can be confusing and can make you feel lost and out of touch with reality and the structure that you used to have.
Connecting with yourself emotionally is very important through difficult times because it can allow you to properly surface your emotions and understand why you are feeling the way you are. This can be done through journaling and writing out the emotions you are experiencing, so that you can analyze them and find patterns or trends.
Another helpful way to allow your emotions to run freely and connect with your mind and heart is through meditation and deep breathing. These practices will help you to stabilize your emotional state and find a balance when your structure feels lost.
Socially
Without the ability to communicate face-to-face with friends and those who do not live with you during times like these, you can feel very isolated and lonely which can make grieving much worse. It is very hard to feel supported without the ability to interact with humans, so it is important to recognize that it is normal to feel distant from the world.
With the ability to connect and communicate through technology, you may want to participate in group video chats with friends and group messages in order to feel as connected and supported as possible. This may help you to grieve your losses and still let out your emotions, so you do not feel like you are going through this alone. Often times, it can be very helpful to know and acknowledge that others are going through the same things and feeling the same emotions as you are.
Spiritually
One of the ways that you can support yourself through difficult times and grieving is to understand and connect with your spirituality. Finding yourself in deep and intense emotions can be scary and may make you feel disconnected to your mind and body.
There are many ways to focus on your mind and spirituality to help you find connection and comfort during times of grief. It can mean spending more time in nature, discovering new breathing techniques to become more present and mindful, or reading spiritual books to learn new things.
Finding Real Comfort During Grief
Have you lost a loved one? Maybe it was an acquaintance you didn’t even know, but you still felt it hard. Grief can even come from losing a job, way of life, or personal item. No matter the reason, you likely found yourself reading this because you are grieving.
When you’re grieving it’s easy to act like nothing’s wrong. It’s also easy to collapse into sobs and not get anything done. These are both very valid, so don’t be hard on yourself. However, you need more than affirming words. Read on for ways to find real comfort during grief.
Take Care of Yourself
Psychologist Chris Rothman of the Center for Grief Recovery suggests some ways you might take care of yourself: taking a soothing bath, wrap yourself in a warm blanket, lie in the sun, gentle exercises like yoga or tai chi.
These are all great means of self-care, but don’t forget to do the essentials. Eat right, exercise, get enough sleep, and make sure not to slack at work. If you find yourself slipping with any of these things, your boss should understand if you need time off. You can also ask your friends and families to help with essentials like cleaning your house or taking care of your kids. They may even offer before you ask!
Reach Out
Don’t try to handle your grief alone. It can be tempting, especially if you are still in denial, but in the end, it will make everything worse. You need positive energy in your life. Some of your friends have been through grief themselves and will have great advice. Others will cheer you up and get you out of the house.
So, reach out! If you don’t feel like saying “I feel awful, does anyone want to hang out?” then just invite a friend over to play a game or something. It is important that you don’t try and guilt your friends into seeing you, either. Just invite their presence into your life and enjoy them. You can be honest about your grief when you feel comfortable, but if you need a distraction that is also okay.
Pursue Your Interests
A project is often a great means of overcoming grief, trauma, depression, and more. Taking on an artistic or even work-related endeavor you feel comfortable with will challenge you and provide distraction when needed. You’ll also feel great overcoming the obstacles the project throws at you.
Just be careful not to let this project overtake your life. If you are a workaholic type, channeling yourself into a project might become unhealthy. A confidence boosting project can be great for your mind, but you still need to process your feelings.
Modify and Stick to Your Routine
This is related to self-care and taking good care of yourself. When you suffer from grief, it’s easy to let your routine fall by the wayside. You may also slip into bad routines like finishing a bottle of wine every day after work.
You may need to stumble with your routine in order to recover. Don’t beat yourself up if you do. When you get the time and strength, however, you need to focus on a positive routine.
Get enough sleep, keep up with your hygiene, eat right, and practice self-care. You can still finish a bottle of wine, too! Just save it for Friday.
Consider Grief Counseling
Professional help is always recommended. If you find some of the items on this list to be too difficult, or even if you are following them all and still feel lost, seek professional help. No one knows grief like a professional grief counselor, and you deserve the best quality help that’s out there.
This post is for informational purposes only. It should not be considered therapy. This blog is only for informational and educational purposes and should not be considered therapy or any form of treatment. We are not able to respond to specific questions or comments about personal situations, appropriate diagnosis or treatment, or otherwise provide any clinical opinions. If you think you need immediate assistance, call your local doctor/psychologist or psychiatrist or the SADAG Mental Health Line on 011 234 4837. If necessary, please phone the Suicide Crisis Line on 0800 567 567 or sms 31393.